I'm pretty sure that the first thing a married person thinks when they see a single woman my age is, "Poor thing! She must be miserable, being so old and so single." Then, the next thing they think is, "Something must be wrong, because it just doesn't make sense that someone would be single at that age!" They then continue to tell me all the reasons why I must be single (apart from the fact that I just don't "try" hard enough).
I've heard so many reasons, and I won't list them all now, but one of my favorites is "You intimidate men. You're too smart and too accomplished. Guys are just too afraid to ." First of all, what is that saying about all married women...? Second, what I am suppose to do to correct that? Be more approachable by being dull and witless? Sure, I'll give it a try.
My friend asked if his sister Juliana could stay the weekend with us. I said sure. She even called me that week to make some arrangements. My week got busy and I didn't think about it again. A week later, last night to be exact, I got a text message from an unknown number saying "Hi Kelly. Just wanted you to know I'll be in tomorrow around 3. Is that okay? -Juliana" I could not for the life of me think who this person was so I promptly responded, "I think you have the wrong number, I don't know who you are." I never got a return text, so that was the end of that.
I was driving today and out of nowhere started thinking, is this the weekend the sister is coming? Juliana! My memory finally came back, and I started apologizing profusely over text, telling her I knew who she was, and she could still stay at my house.
I'm pretty sure my friend was not that happy that I slighted his sister. Without even trying, I'm naturally developing a lack of common sense, but it doesn't seem to impress the men yet...but I think if I keep it up, it'll get 'em.
I'll think I post something and then it doesn't work. Hmmm. Anyway here is what I thought I had posted:
ReplyDeleteLet me guess how it ends, Juliana sleeps over and sets up a double date with you/her brother and her/his buddy. She already loves her future sister in law!
you may not under any circumstances dumb yourself down, I will NOT allow it. and that's final. it's ok if you forget stuff occasionally though.
ReplyDeleteUh yes the dumb girl factor(factor that into your equation). I've tried it and I couldn't be more happy with the results. Men also love ditzy women so make yourself trip a lot and sometimes follow through with actually falling down to the floor.
ReplyDeleteP.S. men love horrible drivers. Take a few crazy turns. And say things like "Oh was that light red?" You'll have him wrapped around your finger in no time.
Haha, I do all those things naturally. In fact I said almost those exact same words about the red light a couple weeks ago.
ReplyDeleteAlso Sarah, thank you for pointing out the two "day 15" postings...that went perfectly with the post though, don't you think? ;)
ReplyDeleteOh I see. Well I guess I'm the dumb one for not picking up on the fact that it was an on purpose mistake.
ReplyDeleteI'm utterly disgusted that your married friends are so opionated about your dating life. You keep up the intelligence lady, we need more of it in this world.
ReplyDelete